It sure has been a minute, hasn’t it? I apologize for yet another hiatus. I was just busy livin’ life. I’m happy to report that my fear of the “mack truck” hitting me when I return to work after a summer of leisure still has not come to fruition. I’m enjoying the routine of work while trying my best to balance it with the duties of motherhood.

I take having a middle-schooler seriously—probably TOO seriously. But as a former 7th-grade teacher for about 13 years, I know how important middle school is for growing, making mistakes, developing independence, failing, and rising back up. I’ve been working hard with my son to teach him how to study, with hopes that one day this will translate into a system he can master on his own. But for now, it’s a lot of frontloading and guiding.

In other news, I didn’t expect the weather to shift this cold this fast in New York. I thought I had a few more weeks of summer dresses before jackets entered the chat, but here we are on the eve of a nor’easter, as I sit in my room praying my neighbor’s tree doesn’t blow right into my bedroom window. Fingers crossed. I’ve been taking advice from Rowan Henchy and telling everyone in my orbit, “I’m sorry, I can’t…there’s a nor’easter coming” for the past week and moving forward until further notice. I low-key love that in the video she so proudly calls it a “northeaster.”

I have a bit of a hodgepodge of a post for you. I have some great outfits I wore to teach high school, and then 10 great things that serve as both personal recs and a super fun life updates.

As I say before I teach every lesson—let’s get this party started (insert Gen-Z eye rolls).

LOOK 1

Loved this fit! The plaid long-sleeve is doing all the heavy lifting, but NOTHING is lifting heavier than my new leather pouch with my initials monogrammed on it!

LOOK 2

I really love this crinkle skirt for all four seasons. Dressed it up with the vest and headed off to teach about the American Revolution—because educating the youth about overthrowing a monarchy 1000% calls for a good fit.

LOOK 3

I am obsessed with this blazer—it received so many compliments! I look forward to the day I can wear it out and about without a tank underneath. These jeans are literally perfect, and the snakeskin shoes added the perfect finishing touch.

LOOK 4

What does one wear to teach on a Friday after a late night of parent conferences? Look no further than this!

LOOK 5

I felt really great about this fit, but then two different people told me I was giving Spring vibes, and that was NOT my intention. However, upon further reflection, I do think it was a bit too springy, even with the brown suede ballet flats.

Here are ten really great things I’ve been loving lately, because life is too short not to share the things that make you weirdly happy.

• I snagged these new croc-embossed boots from the Madewell sale. I knew they were a Substack fan fave, but seeing them in real life—with that croc flair (!!!)—was even better than I expected.

• I found this really fun artwork on Etsy to put in our new living room. The goal is to add more character throughout our home.

• My daughter is in her graphic-novel era. We love getting our books from the local library, but when the books won’t be back for months and we have no chill, using ThriftBooks has been really fun. (PS- Please read El Deafo with your kiddos and then watch the series on Apple TV)

• I don’t know why, but these are the most perfect pumpkin English muffins I’ve ever tasted.

• Two of my friends have started businesses, and I could not be more proud! I love seeing these two amazing women bring their creativity and heart to life.

  • My friend Xan, literally one of the most creative, stylish, and interesting humans I know, has started Sweetpea Florals (check out her IG!). Her tablescapes, florals, and curated decor are seriously jaw-dropping, and if you’re in the South Jersey/Philly area and need a statement floral piece, she is your gal!

  • My other friend Jenny has started Unity Road (here is the IG), making the comfiest, coolest socks from sustainable materials (I can personally vouch—they are incredible, I bought this pair. Even better, 10% of every pair purchased benefits Hug It Forward, a nonprofit that turns plastic waste into classrooms in Guatemala.

• I’m obsessed with these really great denim shirts. They are perfectly oversized and sooooo soft.

• I decided to get the Shark hair dryer on sale at Costco (ballin’ on a budget), and I have no regrets.

• My daughter and I had our lemonade stand and raised over $200 to add to our donation to the Galapagos Whale Shark Project!

• Recent Zara finds that I love: this fringe jacket (GASP!) and this suede jacket.

• I have been in-serious-love with this Moka Pot, and I fear coffee bought outside my home will never compare.

More RaMbLiNg you may enjoy…

Until next time, Ramblers! I’m off to make coffee, check the weather, help with some studying, and probably buy something I absolutely do not need. You know, all about balance around here.

Love ya, mean it!

💓 If you enjoy reading (or listening to) GOOD RAMBLE, here are a few ways to show your support: tap the heart, restack this post, leave a comment, subscribe, or share with a friend!

Feeling generous? Buy me a coffee here—just a tip for my work, all love, no strings.

Subscribe now

Welcome back, my dear Ramblers!

It’s been a minute, and lucky for you, I’ve been trying my best to consistently document some great recent fits. This was officially our second week of school, and knock on wood, in 17 years, this has been by far the smoothest start (KNOCK ON ALL WOOD).

I’m not sure what it is, but something this year has rejuvenated my excitement and passion for teaching! I have been finding so much joy in my work, rocking my microphone while teaching, and smiling more than ever. When something clicks, that’s the end result. It feels good!

I didn’t realize how spoiled I was having two kids in the same school for about 4 years. My older one is off to middle school, and that brings its own challenges — different teachers, different websites, different ways of giving notes, different expectations, you know the drill. However, so far, so good. We had a few math homework explosions, but other than that, the start has been pretty smooth as well.

I’ve caught myself so busy in my daily to-dos that it’s been hard to pop on and off the ‘Stack. But perhaps that’s why things are feeling so smooth. My energy is already divided into 150 different things, and not having it be 151 makes a difference.

Alrighttttt, enough about my feelings. You came here for the outfits, presumably. So let’s dive into what I’ve been wearing while attempting to keep 150 plates spinning!

Affiliate links are included below.

Here is what I’ve been wearing to work as of late! Some outfits I’ve been thinking about how I will “fallify” or transition them into the new season as the temperatures drop. It’s a fun exercise in creativity that I highly recommend: take your favorite summer outfits and challenge yourself to make them fall-ready.

LOOK 1

I saw this dress on J.Crew’s website, and there was something about the print that felt so fun and versatile. I ordered it in two sizes, fearing that the material may be a bit clingy, but my true size worked best. The tie detail in the front is super cute.

I think this dress is transitioning really nicely into the fall. I’ve been trying to get dressed while also imagining, when the temperature drops, how will I fallify this fit? Call it “Dream of Fallification,” (in Red Hot Chilli Peppers tone) if you will.

This is what I envision it looking like on a cool late October day:

LOOK 2

I was back-to-school shoe shopping with my kids (yes, literally the day before school started) and saw these cutie striped sandals at our local DSW. I said, “You know who would like these? … ME!” (in the Grinch voice).

I will say that my usual “don’t break in your shoes and just go” method failed miserably with these. They are STUNNING but absolutely require you to break them in. My feet are still recovering.

I think I would fallify these shoes when the temperatures cool down by wearing them like this:

LOOK 3

My trusty favorite red dress. I wore this on the first day of school, and there were a ton of compliments and love. Oh, and we’re three looks in now—I also chopped my hair off.

I think even this red, screaming-summer dress can be fallified. I’m thinking it could transition into the new season like this:

LOOK 4

I saw this jacket on the Zara website and jumped. I loved the color, tweed, and fringe details.

This jacket will absolutely be an MVP as the weather cools. I think it could be styled like this:

LOOK 5

Quite possibly my favorite look as of late. Still heavily into this top, a favorite from Zara. Yes, I also own her in a beige color. Last time I wore it, I wore it with shorts, but I decided to pair it with wide-leg linen trousers. I am trying to incorporate some more color or interest to my fits, so the red flats did just that.

LOOK 6

I found this dress on the H&M website and knew it was meant to be. I was going to wear it to work with a pair of sandals, but then I envisioned a world where I wear my Tecovas in the summer.

The dress is a bit sheer, so I wore a slip skirt under it. I think it looks a lot more expensive than it is, and the boots made ALL the difference.

If you’re wondering, I still can’t get my boots off on my own.

LOOK 7

A favorite secondhand dress from last year I keep reaching for. The office AC is often set to 68, which feels like icicles are essentially hanging from my nose. However, I shall adapt to my climate. I tossed the navy sweater on, and all was good.

• I hate to admit it, but meal prepping is the greatest gift you can give yourself. I snagged these jars for my overnight oats and these containers for my daily lunch. On Sunday, I just take these chicken packets from Costco, combine them with frozen veggies of my choice, add rice from these packets, sprinkle some coconut aminos, and call it a day.

• This striped cashmere long-sleeve sweater caught my eye, and I think it will be such a great fall transition piece.

• I bought a bolo tie after searching for the perfect one longer than I care to share. I am so excited to style it.

• I was gifted this eye pencil in the color Bright. I like putting it in the inner corner of my eye to make me look less exhausted and a bit more lively and awake. I’ll take all the help I can get.

• Still using this concealer every day since it was gifted to me last year. I’ve tried others, but cannot find one better.

• I decided to join the Candle of the Month Club, and I just saw that my second one has shipped this week, and I CANNOT WAIT.

• My daughter grabbed this stuffed animal at the checkout aisle when shopping at DSW. We all now have one. It smells like lavender, and you microwave it before you go to sleep. It is the most cozy, delightful way to drift off after a long day. You’re welcome.

More RaMbLiNg you may enjoy…

And that’s a wrap for this week! I hope you have an amazing week. Just a reminder that it’s okay to take something off your plate if you need to. No explanation required. The world will continue to turn, and everyone else will survive in your absence.

Love ya, mean it!

💓 If you enjoy reading (or listening to) GOOD RAMBLE, here are a few ways to show your support: tap the heart, restack this post, leave a comment, subscribe, or share with a friend!

Feeling generous? Buy me a coffee here—just a tip for my work, all love, no strings.

Subscribe now

I’ve asked your favorite writers’ favorite writers on Substack what their most prized possession in this world is. Under one simple condition: it cannot be clothing!

Each writer provided a photo and a synopsis declaring their love for their pick. The captions under each image are brought to you by your in-house comedian (who, tbh, I think is the only one laughing at herself), ME!

Enjoy the super scroll, prepare to have a gazillion tabs open, and let us know which pick has you the most giddy.

Some affiliate links are included below.

(Scandi Delights) - Nespresso Milk Frother

I am not human before my morning coffee. I live for our Moccamaster, but while the coffee is obviously essential, the real star in my life is my Nespresso milk frother. Until I’ve had this cup of strong coffee and an absurd amount of foamy milk, I’m unavailable for questions, decisions, or basic human interaction.

(Obsessed With) - Feathered Friends Down Throw Blanket

I never want to live in a world where this blanket doesn’t exist. It is cozy to the extreme, warm in the winter and cool in the summer. Every night, my husband or I read to our daughters in this big ole’ rocking chair while snuggling up under our Feathered Friends blanket. We’ve even taken it on road trips. It’s the best!

(Plan of Care) - Superfood Multi Mist

I love a good facial mist. I've been using this one for years and it instantly refreshes my skin and adds an always-appreciated, uncomplicated hit of hydration (dry skin in Florida is still very much my plight). It’s especially good after a workout, on travel days, or anytime the only skincare "routine" I can muster post-shower is a couple of spritzes to the face.

(The Best Best) - Paper Republic Grand Voyageur Leather Journal

I am big on paper goods, and passionate about having a paper planner. Every year I spend way too long deciding which to buy, but this past year I really nailed it!

This planner features big boxes to list to-do’s on each day, and a big blank page for notes. The leather wears beautifully over time, and you can insert other journals/pads to make it your own. The green with red band also reminds me of an olive—a bonus!

(Duck Fat) - Alessi Michael Graves Bird Whistle Tea Kettle (ebay link)

Attention deficit girlies, listen up!! I need something that physically screams at me to pay attention - if you relate, might I suggest this Michael Graves-designed Alessi kettle? Bonus that it’s gorgeous (hello, Paloma Elsesser AD tour!) & matches my Alessi timer, moka pot, and clock … hey, the first step is admitting you have a problem ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ But this kettle (along with the timer, strict six minute steep) solves a genuine problem for me!

(The Rational Astrologer) - Kate McCleod Sun Stone

I don’t have a skincare routine so much as a desire to be present with myself after a long day. Before I go to sleep, I glide this lotion bar over my arms and legs until it melts. It smells like tangerine and sandalwood, the exact smell I want to end my day with.

I wonder whether the concept of a ritual is real or if we just call our habits that to feel better about ourselves. Still unresolved, but the stone stays either way.

(i think it’s brave) - Sur La Table Bar Magnet

My house is full of things that I am weirdly obsessed with, but the first that comes to mind is my magnetic knife strip, which I don’t use for knives! I use it for keeping everything in the kitchen that I need at my fingertips. It’s amazing how many things in the kitchen are magnetic, making it the perfect system for me — if this is what it means to be 31, I’ll take it.

(Sunday Bagel) - Maldon Sea Salt

Two words: GOOD! SALT! Two types for different use cases: one kosher salt and one finishing salt. I love Diamond Crystal Kosher Salt for cooking, marinating, and dressings and Maldon Sea Salt for sprinkling (especially atop freshly baked chocolate chip cookies!). I twice brought a 1.25lb tub of Maldon Sea Salt to a White Elephant - big hit both times!

(The Green Apple) - Primula Classic Moka Pot

Lattes are clocking in at $12-$13 here in NYC and about a year ago, I decided enough was enough. I don't have the counterspace (nor expendable income) for a fancy barista machine, so I trusted the Italians and got this Moka Pot. It makes creamy, delicious espresso in minutes and now my morning maple sea salt latte is free.

(VETTED) - Thrive Liquid Lash Extensions Tubing Mascara

A friend introduced me to this mascara a few years ago and I’ve never looked back. It goes on in tubes, which means it comes off in tubes and doesn’t leave raccoon eyes every night when you remove it. It’s been a total game changer. It also makes your eyelashes look a mile along which I’m not complaining about!

(Nakeid) - The BEST knitting group ever!

I’m so cheating, but my thing is … my knitting group.For 15 years we’ve met weekly to drink coffee, solve knitting conundrums and opineabout world affairs. We trade book, movie and series’ recos, share our losses, triumphs,recipes and thoughts on everything from German short rows to the Supreme Court’slatest decisions. Of course, they make my life easier – their ideas, handwork expertise, sharpintellects and love – that’s what smart, feisty women with sticks do.

(Double Dutch) - Aquaphor Healing Ointment (the classic giant tube)

I have tried nearly every lip product on God’s green earth, clean or otherwise, and pored over hundreds—nay, thousands—of reviews claiming, “My lips have never been this soft!” Maybe my lips are just obstinate, but nearly every product I’ve tried over the past 30-odd years has left them chapped, waxy (ew), or flaky. Except one: Aquaphor, it was always you. x

(The Nap Trap) - Ryobi Compact Vacuum

This is as sexy as a vacuum gets. I hunted for the perfect playroom and stroller vacuum forever and this is it! It’s super compact but mighty, it’s sleek and doesn’t take up too much space. Using this is so satisfying, I’m finally not ashamed of all the crusty snacks in our stroller and I have no excuse to put off vacuuming small corners of my daughter’s room.

(Align by Kait Santos) - Kindle Paperwhite & Page Kindle Case

My Kindle goes everywhere with me. Even as a mom, when I know I likely won't get a chance to read, it's safely tucked away in my bag, just in case! So easy to use; it's my favorite way to take advantage of the library, and I always have something ready to read. And I love Page's Kindle cases - they have so many fun designs. Pictured here: a coffee chats and Kindle date with my sister. Highly recommend.

(Sigrid’s Wardrobe Reflections) - Yoga International Subscription

One thing I can’t imagine living without is my subscription to Yoga International. I started doing 20 minutes of yoga first thing in the morning during Covid, usually still in my pajamas, and it’s one habit I’ve actually kept. It gives me a good start to the day, and my husband says he can tell when I’ve skipped it. I’m a much better person after yoga—or at least slightly less difficult to live with.

(The Edit Etc) - Smeg Mini Milk Frother

I've been addicted to matcha ever since I realized coffee left me jittery and talking too fast (the West Village girls would’ve been middle schoolers back then). And dropping $7 a day at my local café for a too-weak matcha wasn't filling the void, so I indulged in this Smeg and a few prerequisite tools and started making my own at home. It’s quiet, easy to use, and whips up my double-strength recipe to a quality that rivals any cafe-bought alternatives. The only problem is, my kids are onto it and dipping into my stash for themselves.

(TWDY Unfiltered) - By Rosie Jane, Dylan Perfume

I was turned onto by Rosie Jane when I bought a small sampler set. Dylan was the standout and I purchased a full bottle when I had our second child. No nasties in the ingredients because we were nursing. I also LOVE woody and amber scents. This was IT. I've always wanted a signature scent but I flit around too much. This will, however, always be in my rotation.

(Xue) - Amazon Kindle

I bought my first Kindle almost 20 years ago and have used one nearly every day since. It lets me carry an entire library in my bag, which feels both miraculous and mildly dangerous for someone with no resistance to buying books. I still buy the occasional hard copy though because I love the feel and flow of paper. Some pleasures survive even the invention of something objectively more convenient.

, ME! (GOOD RAMBLE) - Colgate Optic White Toothpaste

True story: I was in the ER last year, on my last leg with an infection, when the nurse came in and was like, “Your teeth are so white. Explain…” As I came back from my hazy fever, I shared with her that I had been using this toothpaste! She screenshotted it, checked my fluids, and I’m just hoping that somewhere, wherever she is, she’s also enjoying the benefits of this product! I do think I have graduated to the “Advanced Level” and will try this toothpaste next.

More RaMbLiNg you may enjoy…

Another incredible roundup! Pardon me as I run out and buy a frother, Kindle case, 52 different vessels to make the perfect coffee/tea, and a yoga membership. Okay, yes, there is definitely a lot more on my list.

A big thank you to all the amazing writers who contributed to this work. I highly suggest checking out their Substacks and tapping that subscribe button. You will not be disappointed.

Love ya, mean it!

💓 If you enjoy reading (or listening to) GOOD RAMBLE, here are a few ways to show your support: tap the heart, restack this post, leave a comment, subscribe, or share with a friend!

Feeling generous? Buy me a coffee here—just a tip for my work, all love, no strings.

Subscribe now

BOY, do I have something exciting for you! I know I’ve shared this before, but if you ever met me IRL, there are a few things I will absolutely bring up in our conversation: I can hum and whistle at the same time, I have AB+ blood type (one of the rarest in the world and a universal recipient), and I am an Aquarius (Leo rising).

Then the universe did its thang and one of my FAVORITE writers on Substack, , reached out to me with the idea of an outfits-inspired-by-astrology post. To say that this was the dream collaboration of my life is an understatement (shhh… please don’t tell my daughter, who recently collab’ed with me on a shark post).

Effie (also a Leo rising) is an integrative astrologer and author of The Rational Astrologer on Substack. Basically, she combines astrology with psychology, somatic practices, and holistic wellness to help people better understand themselves. And I mean… SIGN ME UP!

The Rational Astrologer

Astrology for intentional living, self-inquiry, and the art of becoming ✨

By Effie Forrest

Effie did the real heavy lifting here, writing the synopsis for each outfit based on the astrological rising sign. Your rising sign is the zodiac sign that was rising on the eastern horizon when you were born—and astrologically, it’s often associated with how you present yourself to the world, your first impression, and your overall vibe!

And me, you ask? I read her descriptions and got to work playing digital dress-up.

We hope you enjoy the double dose of astrology by a professional and outfits by me, a completely unlicensed girlie playing dress-up on the internet.

Affiliate links are included below.

ARIES RISING

Aries Risings are the most kinetic people in the room. Lively and magnetic, their aesthetic is built around movement, and anything they wear has to keep up. They’re also natural trendsetters, reliably three steps ahead: the activewear that doesn’t budge mid-workout, the exact right jacket for that one strange week between summer and fall. Aries rules the face, so that’s where the eye goes first; a bold brow, a slicked-back ponytail, an earring that swings when they turn their head.

TAURUS RISING

Taurus Risings can feel quality; the weight of a good wool coat, the difference between cotton and nylon, and the pieces that will last forever. Every purchase is an investment, and everything they own is both timeless and unmistakably theirs. Most of the work of getting dressed happens at the point of purchase, and in the maintenance rituals like skincare treatments and pampering that they do so they can be low-maintenance on a day-to-day basis. Taurus rules the throat, so you’ll always find gentle details there; a neckline that sits exactly right, a gold chain worn daily for a decade, perfume at the pulse point.

GEMINI RISING

Gemini Risings dress the way they talk, bright, eclectic, and faster than you can follow. They love to layer, wear expressive jewelry, and they own everything they need to perform their various hobbies. They can also bring a garment back from the dead through mending and re-working, and will somehow look stunning in a $2 vintage t-shirt they tailored into a masterpiece. Gemini rules the hands and arms so watch for the rings, the pushed-up sleeves, and the gloves nobody else could pull off.

CANCER RISING

Cancer Risings know exactly what to wear for every occasion. The impeccable airport outfit, the perfect festival look, and the pair of shoes that goes on every trip because they can walk ten miles in them. They reject the premise that comfort and beauty are a trade-off. Everything they own is soft, functional, and carrying a little sentiment. You’ll find them cherishing their grandmother’s cardigan, the bag they’ve had since college, and the bracelet from their first boyfriend.

LEO RISING

Leo Risings seem to garner attention wherever they go. Warm, vibrant, and generous, they draw eyes without even realizing. Their formula is deceptively simple: great hair, perfectly tailored basics, and eye-catching statement pieces. Leo rules the heart and the back, which is why an open-back moment or a coat worn over the shoulders feels so natural to them.

VIRGO RISING

Virgo Rising’s aesthetic is all in the details. Unique tailoring. Carefully layered pieces. An inherent awareness of how to dress for their coloring and body type. The opposite of impulsive, every piece they own has been scrutinized and serves a purpose. The hidden details of an outfit are their favorite part of getting dressed; custom buttons, a t-shirt with an open back, a blazer with bright lining. Virgo rules the abdomen, so you’ll also notice an accentuation there through the silhouette of their clothes, cropped shirts, or sheer tops.

LIBRA RISING

Libras are committed to the best. Their ability to consider all of the options comes in handy when building their wardrobe. They take their time getting dressed and therefore put together perfect outfits where every addition was carefully chosen for its harmonic balance with every other piece. Despite how devoted they are to getting the look, they still manage to look effortless and comfortable in their own skin. Libra rules the lower back, which is why pants that fit perfectly are a deal-breaker for them.

SCORPIO RISING

Scorpio Rising’s aesthetic focuses on structured, heavy materials. They don’t want their outfits to detract from their natural beauty. They dress how they want to be perceived in any given scenario. Their outfits reflect their desires, whether they’re dressing for a job interview or a date. Known for the most beautiful outerwear, it’s as if they rely on the outer pieces as protection from being scrutinized.

SAGITTARIUS RISING

Sagittarius Rising dresses for the possibility that the day might go somewhere unplanned. They want quality that can keep up. Jeans that won’t disintegrate, shorts that can handle a hike and dry off after an alpine plunge, shoes that carry them from the day’s adventure to dinner. They love vintage pieces with a story and any article of clothing with character. They are always a little undone in the most charming way.

CAPRICORN RISING

Capricorn builds a wardrobe the way they build everything else – deliberately, and to last. Silky neutrals, tailored lines, natural fibers, and jewelry pared back to almost nothing. It reads as quiet luxury. They are composed, unhurried, and only asking for attention they have earned through their efforts. Staying away from trends, they treasure classic pieces they have had for years and years. If you need to know the capsule wardrobe essentials, ask a Capricorn rising.

AQUARIUS RISING

For Aquarius, getting dressed is identity work. The look is inventive and faintly futuristic, usually a step or two ahead of whatever everyone else is about to discover. They love bold color, sheer material, and unexpected construction. Expressing nonconformity is a choice. Fun bags are a particular sartorial fascination of theirs; totes, keychains, and fun backpacks are staples in their closet.

PISCES RISING

Pisces dress to their current mood. Often dreamy, feminine, ethereal, they favor flowy dresses, deep blues, soft muted colors, and accessories that shift as they catch the light. Everything drapes, and the whole aesthetic is chameleonic — changing with the season, the setting, and whoever they happen to be around. Their outfits are often inspired by natural environments. Dresses that remind them of water, sweaters with textures akin to moss, etc. Feeling comfortable and flowing is important to them, and everything they own reflects that.

More RaMbLiNg you may enjoy…

A HUGE shoutout to for being the brain behind this post! If you don’t subscribe to her work, I mean, what are you waiting for?! I KNOW the Substack gang lovessss us some astrology.

Sooooo, are the stars aligned with the outfits? We’ll let you be the judge! If you happen to disagree with your sign’s outfit, please take it up with the universe.

Now excuse me while I go be weird, independent, and slightly detached…but obviously, I expect applause.

Love ya, mean it!

💓 If you enjoy reading (or listening to) GOOD RAMBLE, here are a few ways to show your support: tap the heart, restack this post, leave a comment, subscribe, or share with a friend!

Feeling generous? Buy me a coffee here—just a tip for my work, all love, no strings.

Subscribe now

Hello Ramblers!

It’s me, your Aquarius-ghosting friend, slowly emerging from ghost mode. Ghosting is something I really enjoy doing, but I know it can be quite frustrating for friends and family. There is no “I’m going to be taking some time off” announcement. Just radio silence.

Ghost mode is truly restorative. I’ve spent the last few weeks winding down summer with my family. I’ve also been really focused on trying to manage my laryngopharyngeal reflux (LPR) by, you know, not eating foods that make me want to vom. Oh! And I’ve even been advocating for a voice amplifier to teach with due to my esophagus probz. Just call me DJ TRACI (record scratch: wiki wiki)!

This past week, I’ve been locked in preparing for my new students to arrive! All of the usual classroom things, but also starting the year with a “rebrand” of some sort. There is nothing an ADHD-er loves more than a rebrand.

I’ve been trying to meal prep at the beginning of the week to save myself the agony of having to leave my afternoon paralysis to make a sandwich. Laying my outfits out each night for the next day. Reading before bed. And carrying on with the mentality that if it takes you under a minute to put something away, do not wait—put the damn thing in its place!

Waking up each morning and NOT doomscrolling in bed.

Some good stuff!

As much as my fellow attentional ladies (and gents) love a rebrand, we also love ditching our hyperfixations once the dopamine wears off. So please send me your thoughts and prayers that I can continue the school year with the same level of zest for overnight oats that I have now!

Alright, let’s dabble in some outfits and random things that have piqued my interest as of late!

RECENT OUTFITS.

The past week has been a whole lot of teacher meetings and classroom setup, with a little bit of life and travel sprinkled in. I was truly able to embrace professional-ISH to the extreme.

Affiliate links are included below.

LOOK 1

First-day-back-to-work fit! What better way to start the 2026–2027 school year than in a pair of cow-print flats? LFG!

LOOK 2

What I wore to professional development and the gastroenterologist. I also snagged this fringe tank in black (s/o to the one and only, !)

LOOK 3

No, I wasn’t hiking the Adirondack Mountains. I was, instead, standing on desks, stapling borders to walls. This is what I wore to set up my classroom, attend meetings, and complete my bloodborne pathogens compliance training!

LOOK 4

A great fit from last week, worn to an appointment. I snagged these ballet flats to serve as a throw-around pair when I don’t want to wear my nicer ones, and I find them to be a worthwhile investment.

LOOK 5

This is what I wore for our car ride to the lake for some R&R. The Four-Shirted Husband™ described it as “Sporty Spice.” Not exactly the look I was going for, but Mel C. was ALWAYS my favorite Spice Girl.

RECENT THINGS.

As I try my hardest to really embrace my “good habits,” I have stumbled upon a few things worth sharing.

• I have been REALLY enjoying eating baked oats for breakfast! It literally feels like eating cake for breakfast and is the perfect meal that feels like a treat!

• reminded me how powerful a brown mascara is in giving a subtle definition while not looking too overdone. I LOVE this brown mascara with my whole heart.

• Now that work has begun, I’m back to wearing makeup. I love this cleansing balm to wipe away makeup while also keeping my skin soft as a baby’s bottom.

• I snagged this dress for my “second day of school” outfit. I love her and I LOVE the material. A great summer to fall transition piece if you ask me!

More RaMbLiNg you may enjoy…

And that’s all I’ve got for this week! The kiddos enter the classroom next week, so I’ll most likely continue my MIA streak until my nervous system realizes I am not, in fact, being chased by a bear.

Until the next ramble,

💓 If you enjoy reading (or listening to) GOOD RAMBLE, here are a few ways to show your support: tap the heart, restack this post, leave a comment, subscribe, or share with a friend!

Feeling generous? Buy me a coffee here—just a tip for my work, all love, no strings.

Subscribe now

Greetings, Ramblers!

I hope you’re having a great week. Might I remind you, summer is very much NOT over? As the kids say, “Don’t rush me, bro.” That doesn’t mean you can’t be excited and anticipatory about fall—and for me personally, fall fashion! We don’t have to live in extremes: Team Summer vs. Team Fall. We can co-exist!

I this current era of political polarization, I think we could all (myself included) use a little practice remembering that we don’t always have to pick an extreme. Sometimes you can love summer AND be excited for fall. Sometimes you can just…exist somewhere in the middle. Crazy! I know.

But remember, when we’re in the depths of November, sitting in darkness at 4:45 p.m., low on vitamin D, and wishing for a UV 10 (with sunscreen, of course), we may wish we didn’t rush these days. We may wish we didn’t wear rollneck sweaters during a heatwave. But maybe some won’t regret it at all—and honestly, I do love that for you.

I’m trying to embrace the crap out of these last few weeks of my summer before I go back to work. The end-of-summer dread is creeping in. I’m reminding myself to continue living slow for as long as I can. It’s truly the way my body was manufactured to function—a life with zero rushing.

Unfortunately, I don’t get that during the school year, when it’s essentially like a Mack truck hits my peaceful months of pure zen. But I remain optimistic that, yes, the Mack truck is coming and I can't stop it. Maybe it can just hit me slowly this year.

My teacher friends are reading and either shaking their heads thinking good luck with that, hysterically laughing, or wide-eyed saying, “SHOW US THE WAY.”

The thing is, I’m entering year 17 in education and still don’t have it figured out. But I sure hope I can find it!

Let’s dive into some great August fits. I hope these inspire you to get dressed, be creative, and giggle.

Affiliate links are included below.

LOOK 1

This is a newer shirt to the arsenal, and I really love it! I wore this for a family dinner, and it felt quite fun and romantic. I added these green ballet flats to the fit to add a touch of color—and do I dare say, a tiny bit of suede fall?

🏅Unsung Hero: HOMEMADE LONDON FOGS

I’m in my WHAT IS CAUSING MY LARYNGOPHARYNGEAL REFLUX ERA (oh god, not another era!), and I’m trying to take a break from coffee. I’m not okay. This is my attempt at drinking tea.

LOOK 2

After watching Night at the Museum, we decided it was time to take the kiddos into the city for a Day at the American Museum of Natural History.

It was awesome. I particularly loved the river valley civilizations and had zero interest in the dinosaurs. I WANT TO TALK ABOUT HIEROGLYPHICS! I tried pre-teaching my son about his ancient civ social studies curriculum for next year, but he shared, “I do not learn in the summer.”

Quick lunch at Sarabeth’s afterward, then off to the smoldering-hot subway and, finally, home.

🏅Unsung Hero: CLOTHING DRYING RACK

Maybe it’s because I’m still finishing Yesteryear (literally slugging through), maybe it’s because I like to save electricity. But hang-drying your clothing during a heat wave feels like I am really adulting.

LOOK 3

Wore this little number for a coffee date with a friend. Considering we stayed and yapped wayyyy too long, it was the perfect balance of comfort and polished.

P.S. Please read ’s You Should Date Your Friends - which fully inspired me to get off my butt and be social.

🏅Unsung Hero: STRAW SHOULDER BAG

I had been eyeing the J.Crew version for a while, but couldn’t stomach the bill. I saw this cutie at H&M and she’s equally as great.

LOOK 4

Alright, don’t laugh, but this is my “what I wore to go to Target and buy school supplies” fit. Which, mind you, on August 10th (most NY schools in my region start September 1), Target was completely out of FOLDERS. I know I’m a last-minute human, but I felt this was me actually being PROACTIVE!

In all fairness, us teachers cannot think about school in July. It’s sacrilegious. Therefore, our kids will have the weird folders, I suppose. My son put a hard “no” on the only remaining folder, a cute cuddly kitten, for middle school….lame.

🏅Unsung Hero: VOLUMINIZING EYEBROW GEL

When I do a quick no-makeup/makeup look, it’s usually tinted moisturizer, a brow tint, and a little bronzer if needed. This brow brush (gifted) has officially defeated my old one in the Battle of the Brows.

LOOK 5

Here is my “What I Wore” to see the live-action Moana movie. My daughter completed the summer reading challenge at our library, and the reward was tickets to see this movie. Our library consistently goes above and beyond for local families. We're a small town, but our library is mighty.

I don’t know where in my star chart it explains this, but I loathe children’s movies. But an opportunity to celebrate a reading champion (10/10 of her books were about sharks)? I’m all in!

🏅Unsung Hero: REALLY Great Adult Book Recs

There have been so many awesome recent posts about good books to read and I have to highlight a few: ’s 20 Recently Read Books I Reccomend, ’s Beach Reads, ’s A very special July Books & Looks, ’s Summer Reading in Review, and ’s The Books People ACTUALLY Read this Summer 2.0 and gosh, I definitely missed some folks, FORGIVE ME!

LOOK 6

Last-day-of-camp-pickup fit. This tee still reigns supreme in my closet. I snagged these red flip-flops and they’re solid. I just feel like they’re loud (?)—which usually isn’t something that agitates me, but this one does on my hardwood floors only.

🏅Unsung Hero: PRIZEFIGHTER | MUMFORD & SONS

I know I’m pretty late to the party. And I should still be stimming to Gracie Abrams, but this Mumford & Sons release is DOING IT ALL for me rn. Plus, I stan Sierra Ferrell.

More RaMbLiNg you may enjoy…

Anyway, wear the shorts. Wear the sweater. Wear the ballet flats. Wear whatever the hell makes you happy. Summer is still here, fall is coming, and we are allowed to enjoy ‘em both!

TEAM SUMMER, TEAM FALL, TEAM I JUST HOPE ALL TEAMS HAVE FUN!

Love ya, mean it!

💓 If you enjoy reading (or listening to) GOOD RAMBLE, here are a few ways to show your support: tap the heart, restack this post, leave a comment, subscribe, or share with a friend!

Feeling generous? Buy me a coffee here—just a tip for my work, all love, no strings.

Subscribe now

I snuck away from the pool with my fishing rod tucked under one arm and a tackle box in the other.

After a week of hauling overstuffed beach bags, making three different lunches because apparently no one in my family can agree on a sandwich, and keeping everyone entertained, this was my hour.

My chance to be alone.

I quickly power walked away from my family before someone could ask, “Mom where are you going?”

I’m tired. A bit burnt out. Always everything to everyone. I go to the dock to escape responsibilities, clear my mind, and remember who I am as an individual.

I walked up to the dock and noticed there were no cars there. I felt my smile widen. A perfect sign that I’d found solitude.

I walked up and saw an older man sitting at the picnic table with a fishing rod resting beside him. I’d be lying if I said my first thought wasn’t, “Ugh, I have to share this space. I have to share my quiet. I have to make small talk.” I was tired of giving pieces of myself to everyone except me. I wanted time with the version of myself I rarely got access to.

There was part of me that considered turning around and finding a different spot. But that meant risking my family spotting me first and pulling me back into referee duty.

I walked up to the picnic table, smiled, and said hello. He was well into his mid-80s. He wore two knee braces, an American flag hat, sunglasses, and was slowly rolling a cigar.

I set down my tackle box and started casting. Within minutes, he felt a tug. He reeled in a panfish with a grin.

“You ought to try live bait,” he said, eyeing the lure I’d tied on. “I’ve got some worms if you want.”

I laughed and said, “I’m terrified of worms.” I launched into an overexplanation about how I couldn’t even look at them without feeling physically ill. He inspected me for a minute and then belly laughed. “Bring your rod on over.”

I walked to the picnic table, and together we sat on the bench while he carefully threaded a worm onto my hook. He looked at me and said, “We’re going to get you a fish.”

It was in that moment I realized I wasn’t going to spend the rest of the afternoon alone. I was going to spend it with Jim.

As we talked, he looked out toward the massive lake. I couldn’t see exactly where he was looking because his dark sunglasses covered his eyes. “My family’s all out on the boat,” he said. “I don’t go out much anymore.”

I smiled and shared that it seemed we had both escaped our families that afternoon.

We made small talk about the lake and the different fish that we’ve caught and lost. I joked with him that he probably wanted to fish in peace, but now he was stuck with a Chatty Cathy. He laughed and said there’s nothing he loves more than telling stories.

We continued to chat about the small stuff — where’s your house? How long have you been here? — and he shared that he was, and still is, a farmer. He farms fields of cabbage and other fresh vegetables. He shared that life on the farm is a bit harder now that his wife passed away two months ago from congestive heart failure.

Her last few years were spent on oxygen and frequent hospital trips. Two weeks before he lost her, his family was preparing to celebrate their sixtieth wedding anniversary.

But instead, he had to call everyone and share that he didn’t think she was going to make it to the party.

And she didn’t.

Instead of celebrating sixty years together, he was busy planning her funeral.

He shared that everyone still came, and they had the most beautiful celebration of life. Exactly what she would’ve wanted.

He said to me,

“I miss her every single minute of every single day since I’ve lost her.”

My heart sank. It took me a minute to respond. Then I asked the only question that felt right: “So tell me how you met.”

He shared the story of her growing up on the farm next to him. He said he used to sit behind her on the bus and pull her curly hair in elementary school. Finally, he gained the courage to ask her if she’d go get a milkshake with him. The rest was history.

He shared that, if it were up to her, she would’ve had twelve kids. However, the doctor cut her short after she had five back-to-back. He is both a proud grandfather and great-grandfather.

We took a pause as I felt a tug on my rod. He coached me through it as I jerked the rod up and reeled in what felt like a cat that fell in a bathtub. Surprisingly enough, it was a bullhead catfish.

We continued talking as he grabbed a blue microfiber towel to grip the irritated fish. He showed me where the venomous parts were, and I ducked down close to him as he used pliers to remove the hook. He could sense my nerves and assured me the fish would be okay.

He shared that he also has a daughter who couldn’t hurt a fly. He said he could see how much I loved and feared fishing. He grabbed another worm from his cup and hooked it on accordion style.

My next question was, “Sixty years is impressive. What’s your best advice for the rest of us?”

He said, “I know it may sound cliché, but it’s true. Never go to bed mad.” He said to kiss, make up, and move on. Let every day be a fresh start to move forward. He followed with, “You never know what the next day may bring.”

It made me think about all the times I’ve done exactly that. Times I’ve gone to bed angry with my husband, let the frustration sit overnight, and woken up unsure of how to find our way back to each other.

His second piece of advice was to retire early if you can. His biggest regret was waiting until 78 to retire from his business, which he eventually passed down to his sons. He shared that at 85, after losing his wife, he wished he had taken more time to travel and live life together at a slower, more beautiful pace.

I thought about the conversations I’ve had with my husband — me dreaming about retiring early, him reminding me to plan responsibly.

The difference is, right now, I have the luxury of tomorrow.

Jim was sitting across from me in grief knowing that there are moments he can never get back.

As the afternoon went on, the conversation wandered into the deeper stories of our lives. I shared our family’s story and my husband’s service. We talked about raising kids, working full time, and the hard parts of life. He shared that he was a Vietnam War vet, and I told him how much respect I had for him.

He said being drafted was a part of his life he hated to talk about.

“I don’t like talking about ‘Nam. I had no business being there. I was a farm boy. I didn’t wanna fight.”

He shared that the only things that got him through Vietnam were marijuana and warm beer.

But I had a feeling he wanted someone to listen. So I did. He told me about basic training, where they went down the line asking what everyone knew how to do.

“Anybody have medical experience?”

A few hands went up.

“Anybody know how to handle a gun?”

More hands.

He laughed as he remembered sitting there thinking, What the hell am I going to contribute here?

Then came the question that changed everything.

“Anybody ever drive a tractor?”

His hand shot into the air.

We both burst out laughing.

Except when he got to Vietnam, he wasn’t driving a tractor anymore. He was driving a bulldozer, clearing miles of jungle around roads, trails, and military bases so there were fewer places for the enemy to hide.

He shook his head. And then he repeated what he had said earlier,

“I was just a farm boy,” he said. “I had no business being there.”

He had complicated feelings about his time there. He was grateful he didn’t suffer from PTSD like many of his friends, but he didn’t want to revisit those memories.

The conversation paused perfectly when yet another tug came on my line. I reeled in a beautiful perch. After each fish I catch, I like to take a picture of it. So millennial of me, but there’s something about documenting each one of these accomplishments. I asked him if his kids do this, and he said not his kids, but his grandkids.

I asked Jim if we could take a picture together, considering it was “our fish.” He told me absolutely not — it was my fish — but of course he’d take a picture with me. He laughed and said his kids would get a real kick out of these pictures.

I heard a golf cart zoom into the lot.

“Mom!”

I looked up and saw my kids and my husband pop out. They saw the fish and came running over. I introduced everyone to Jim and referred to him as our new uncle. He laughed.

He went to add another worm to my hook, but I stopped him. I remembered he had mentioned he hadn’t eaten lunch yet, and it was already 3:00 p.m.

“I think it’s time for you to go take care of yourself and grab a bite to eat,” I said.

He nodded and packed up.

I told him that I hoped our paths crossed again, and he agreed. I watched him slowly walk back to his car.

Two knee braces. An American flag hat. Sunglasses. Fishing rod in hand.

Earlier that afternoon, I had walked onto that dock disappointed that someone else was sitting on "my" spot. I wanted quiet. I wanted an hour where nobody needed anything from me.

Instead, I found Jim.

And to my surprise, the thing I thought was interrupting my solitude filled my cup in the most beautiful way.

I came looking for alone time, an empty dock. I left holding the stories of an 85-year-old farmer, Vietnam vet, fisherman, husband, father, grandfather, great-grandfather, and storyteller.

He reminded me to slow down. To listen. To notice the stories that are sitting right beside me.

Because the stories are everywhere if we’re willing to stay long enough to hear them.

Thanks for being here. I hope you find your own unexpected dock conversation soon.

And next week, we’ll get back to some fun fashion content. I live in waves of multitudes.

💓 If you enjoy reading (or listening to) GOOD RAMBLE, here are a few ways to show your support: tap the heart, restack this post, leave a comment, subscribe, or share with a friend!

Subscribe now

More RaMbLiNg you may enjoy

To set the stage, a quick reminder: an A.B.C. party stands for “Anything But Clothes.” You show up wearing an outfit made of caution tape or perhaps a fit crafted from old CVS receipts. I’…

Read more

Hi Ramblers! Are we “Ramblers?” IDK, but maybe? I’m here for it. What a whirlwind of a week it’s been. I’m still trying to calculate whether it was a great week or whether feelings, my luteal phase, and impulsivity simply got the best of me.

got vulnerable…

I wrote a post, the girl with the messy backpack, essentially sharing my struggles with ADHD from c…

Read more

It’s been a while since I’ve hit a low this low. Over something quite ridiculous. The funny thing is I deal with way harder, way more difficult, and way more exhausting things on a daily basis. But why was this so much harder?

I was the kid who would come home from school every day with a backpack that looked like an atomic bomb exploded within it. One time, my mom actually cleaned out my backpack at the end of the year and found an actual food item (a Chinese steamed pork patty) from Home & Careers rotting at the bottom. My locker would start the year cute and fun and end the year a disaster.

I’d clean my room, or better yet, my Mom would clean my room, and by 5:30 p.m. it was a mess again. I couldn’t close cabinets, twist on drink tops, or put away food after eating it.

My poor mom would spend hours driving me around town after school and practice, picking up my missing belongings. I’ll never forget my lacrosse coach from middle school calling my mom, while I’m a senior in high school at this point, and saying, “I’m having my youth practice and I found Traci’s stick bag and a bag of her jewelry.”

My poor clarinet spent more time around town being abandoned than it did in the actual band.

In college, I had to take summer courses because of my lacrosse schedule and student teaching commitment. I’ll never forget lounging in my backyard with my mom sunning and then jumping up out of nowhere saying, “Oh my God, my classes started today, I need to get to Boston.” I literally threw everything in my car and drove from NY to Boston that night.

It took a while for me to get an official ADHD diagnosis. I feel like I was so supported growing up by my mom, my dad, and my coaches. They were the safety net that always prevented me from falling. I know it had to drive my mom insane to work all day and then have to chauffeur me on a collection tour around town, but she did it and did a great job of hiding her frustration.

I excelled and juggled so much athletically that I think it was easy for people to simply say, “She has a lot on her plate.” People rarely got mad at me. Even my teachers gave me grace when I didn’t have my homework done in time because they knew I was going to work my ass off to finish it as soon as possible with maximum effort. They could see the shame and terror on my face. My first grade teacher shared this tidbit about me with my mom: “She’ll never be a poker player.” Every feeling is always all over my face.

My mom and others didn’t need to get mad at me, because I would get so mad at myself.

I earned a scholarship to play lacrosse at Boston University. I walked onto campus with an entire team of academic advisors assigned to me with one goal — to get me across the finish line.

I honestly don’t know how I survived playing a Division I sport and managing school. I still have nightmares that I forgot my cleats for an away game. I still have nightmares that my locker was a mess and the team had to do a 20-mile Airdyne as a result. I still have nightmares I forgot to turn in my weekly journal to my coach and the captains were going to have a stern talking with me.

I ended up surprising a lot of people, not because I magically developed skills to overcome my undiagnosed ADHD, but because I had that underdog chip on my shoulder. One of the coolest yet most aggravating ADHD traits is when you tell us we can’t do something, we’re going to prove you wrong with every fiber of our body. And I did.

There were signs, and there were challenges. I remember getting out of practice and getting myself ready to attend my “History in Film” class on the other side of campus. I had to take the BUs (Boston University Bus, best name ever), and I wasn’t in a rush because the professor was super laid back and it was mostly classmates who were just taking grad classes.

I strolled into class and saw blue books everywhere. IYKYK, it was the day of the final exam. I was convinced it was the week after. I had to bring my own research and write a paper. I had nothing. I had research for a capstone I was doing in another class, and somehow I wrote a paper about nutrition and history. It made no sense. I got an A- which makes even less sense.

I continued to struggle into adulthood. Projects half completed, physical space a mess, but professional space always neat as could be. Personal mail that hasn’t been opened in weeks. Constantly needing reminders and systems in place because I worried I would forget something important.

Motherhood is where the masking and coping came to an end. Now I wasn’t only managing my own schedule and life, but I was in charge of two others (not including husband, he is very well capable of handling his own schedule). I was now a part of group chats with 30 other people and would come back to a phone with 62 missed messages. Paralysis. My inbox exploded with unread emails.

So much of my brain power is spent trying not to forget anything. The reminders, the lists, the mental checklists, the constant scanning of what needs to happen next. It’s exhausting to always feel like I’m trying to prevent the next mistake. And when so much energy goes toward remembering everything, there isn’t much space left for anything else.

My colleagues would actually tell you I’m very “Type A” and “incredibly organized,” and that’s because I have to be. Being the teacher my students deserve takes so much effort behind the scenes that most people never see. I put so much effort into my 7 a.m.-3 p.m. job that I am burnt out by the time I get home. I have no executive functioning fibers left in me to manage my actual family. And sometimes I fail. Sometimes I fail in ways that hurt the people I love the most.

I forget to RSVP to the party. I get confused with times and locations and show up late or am rushing because I’m in the wrong town. I miss the turn. I make mistakes that affect other people. I fail. And now it’s not just me being angry with myself, which is a battle I’ve had for 38 years. It’s knowing that my mistakes don’t only affect me anymore. There are people I love counting on me. And that is a pain deeper than any failure I’ve ever had.

It’s not easy being what feels like the “disaster” Mom. I try to wear it as a badge and make it my personality, or turn it into a joke. Sometimes someone will send me a separate message because they know I might miss something buried in a group chat, and I am genuinely grateful for that. But it also embarrasses me because it feels like proof of the things I already fear about myself — that I can’t always be counted on unless someone steps in. The shame hits differently when my mistakes don’t just affect me, but the people I love.

In addition to all of the fun inattentive traits I have, I struggle with rejection sensitivity dysphoria. It’s a phenomenon that involves sudden and overwhelming pain that is triggered by real or perceived criticism, rejection, or failure.

I will go to great lengths to avoid disappointing people. I will give up on hobbies (most recently watercolor painting, lol) to avoid failure. I know I’m not perfect, but I desperately don’t want to fall short. I’m constantly scanning and reading the room and conversations for subtle signs of rejection.

I also feel secondhand rejection sensitivity, or rejection by proxy, with my own kids. I internalize their exclusions and see them as my own failure to protect them or help them fit in. I get angry with myself. Suddenly, I’m scanning for every sign of exclusion, wondering what I could have done differently.

And that same fear doesn’t stop with my kids. It spills over into how I see myself as a mother and how I imagine other people see me.

I want my children to know that my struggles were never because I loved them less. If anything, they are the reason I work so hard to understand myself and become a better version of myself for them.

I worry, is it because I’m not in the PTA? Do they think I think I’m better than them? I wish they knew it’s simply because my plate is overflowing and I don’t want to burn out.

Sometimes another parent will ask, “Why weren’t you at the game?” And I never know how to explain that it’s not because I don’t care. It’s because by that point, I am running on empty. I’m trying so hard to remember everything and prevent myself from dropping the ball that sometimes there’s just nothing left.

After my formal diagnosis, I found treatment that has definitely helped in so many ways. Talk therapy helps with the negative self-talk, but I still struggle, and I still have really hard days.

I still talk negatively to myself and refuse to give myself the same grace. When my kids make a similar mistake, I can frame it to them as, “That is a really hard feeling. It’s okay to make a mistake. Let’s learn from this and move forward.” (Dr. Becky would be proud.) But I can’t offer that same forgiveness, compassion, and understanding to myself.

So much of my mental space can be easily taken over by feelings that I’m disliked, unworthy, and alone.

I’ve had ADHD coaches say to me, “But look at how much you’ve accomplished, there are so many strengths!”

I don’t see them. I see myself being viewed as a joke. I see the constant putdowns about myself to make my mistakes feel smaller. I see a little girl who masked so hard. A little girl who wanted to be accepted. I see the college student who tried to prove everyone wrong despite being exhausted. I see a new Mom who felt so much shame she couldn’t finish the dishes. I see mountains of laundry that was embarrassingly unfolded. I see a “veteran mom” who had a hard parenting moment yesterday.

I see a person who can give everyone in the world grace and compassion, but reserves nothing for herself.

Of all the great I have done in the past few months — a fundraiser for my daughter. Building my Substack. Reaching out to new people, trying to make friends. Hosting playdates. Arts. Crafts.

All I can see is the mistake I made yesterday. All I can feel is the shame of letting someone down. No need to be mad at me, because it will never measure up to the anger I already feel toward myself.

The first step was a diagnosis. The second step was/is support. The third step is to learn about myself and give myself the grace to reflect and grow. And the irony is, I would never want my own children to speak to themselves the way I speak to myself.

There’s no nice lesson to learn or ending here. Yesterday was a hard day. On the surface, it probably sounds trivial. It was one small mistake that opened up 38 years of feelings. But we all have layers.

The girl with the messy backpack was never the problem.

She was just a girl trying really hard to navigate a world where she spent years trying to prove she belonged.

And maybe reflecting on it here is a small step toward self-forgiveness.

But mostly, it’s a reminder to anyone who resonates with this: You’re not alone. You’re not broken. You’re doing the best you can.

Onward,

A Note:

I also want to give a huge thank you to for the piece she published this morning that inspired me to finally write this. I’m not sure how she does it, but she always seems to publish exactly what I need to read at exactly the right time.

💓 If you enjoy reading (or listening to) GOOD RAMBLE, here are a few ways to show your support: tap the heart, restack this post, leave a comment, subscribe, or share with a friend!

Subscribe now

Share

Last year around this time I wrote one of my favorite posts, Outfits I Wore To Camp Pickup. It was all about not waiting for an event or specific plan to wear your special pieces.

With a few weeks of camp down, I decided to write the sequel! I kept in mind that same idea of getting dressed for joy and not caring if it’s a bit overdressed for the day.

A fe…

Read more

My daughter came to me a few weeks ago in sheer panic, asking me with her full chest:

“SO MOM, DID YOU KNOW WHALE SHARKS ARE ENDANGERED?”

I shared with her that I wasn’t exactly up to date with the most recent (ish?) whale shark news, and I was sad to hear this.

We went to the library and checked out some books on whale sharks. We read about why they are b…

Read more

Does anyone else love those Just Ice Tea drinks? My favorite is the honey green tea which is true perfection. FYI: this is NOT sponsored, lol.

The drink also gives me a major dose of nostalgia because it reminds me of drinking Snapple Apple as a youngin’ (my teeth hurt just thinking about it) and immediately announcing the Snapple Fact printed under the …

Read more

Just coming off of the most lovely week at the lake with our family. I’ve shared my absolute love for the lake before, so I won’t bore you with it again here. I think I’ve maxed out my use of the phrase “in my ___ era,” so I’ll do my best not to declare this my fishing era.

A few weeks ago, I formally declared my love for fishing. At the lake, I stayed c…

Read more

Have no fear, we’re not having a preschool graduation party. I’m not sure if this was a niche experience of my own in a college town like Boston, but does anyone remember those ABC parties — as in anything but clothes? People would roll up wearing things like a trash bag, a sheet, newspapers… I mean, the possibilities were endless.

I decided to take a li…

Read more

I’m in my summer Traci era, which also means meta Traci is fully online. And nothing captures that better than this ancient parable: “The Old Man Lost His Horse.”

Read more

If The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills’s Amanda Frances can manifest a husband, we can manifest the summer of our dreams.

I always spend time between Christmas and New Year’s creating a vision board for the year. I think I’ve realized one of the many reasons I don’t stick with it is that it’s too long-term. An entire year is too far ahead for me to thin…

Read more

This week felt super booked and busy, which you’ll definitely see reflected in the outfits below. But despite the calendar, I’m finally starting to feel like summer is actually around the corner. I think even my nervous system can feel it.

My students are basically done, my own kids’ graduations are behind us (which, for the record, turned out to be a co…

Read more

I have to say it…it’s a great day to be a fan of the New York Knicks.

I actually deleted the intro I had already written for this post because it suddenly felt completely irrelevant to how I’m feeling right now.

There really isn’t much more to say than this: this team, this playoff run, and this series have brought so much joy to so many people. It’s hard…

Read more

Life has been booked and busy lately. Not necessarily in a bad way, but in that way where you have incredibly limited resources to devote to anything other than staying hydrated, fed, clothed, and sheltered.

When life starts to feel this way, I enter ultimate Aquarius mode. This is a unique trait of the rarest of horoscopes: we simply disappear for a bi…

Read more